Please sir, put a shirt on and pull those britches up!

     There was a news story recently about an altercation between Hip-hop stars Rick Ross (above) and Young Jeezy at the BET awards. Or perhaps the dispute was between members of their "posse." In any event, gunshots were said to be fired.
     I really don't care if these two go at it like Aaron Burr and Alexander Hamilton. (Errata: Every Kentucky public official and attorney must swear an oath that they have never participated in a duel). What struck me was the photograph of Ross which accompanied the story. Why is a man such as this walking around with no shirt on? This guy has bosoms bigger than most women I know. He needs a bra in the worst way.
     And look at the pants. They aren't merely slung low in the hip-hop fashion. They are pulled down as if he is about to sit on the toilet. Why, oh why, would anyone pay to see this gentleman anywhere but in a circus sideshow?
     My children sometimes ask me why I wear a t-shirt when I go swimming. I'm a string bean next to this guy, but this is why children. Fat people should wear shirts.
     And everybody should keep their britches pulled up. Except when they're sitting on the toilet.